Friday, November 03, 2006 @11:16 PM
we broke tradition.
we used to visit only once, during the
qin ming, we would always go to that specific spot at choa chu kang, to
shao mu at my ah ma's grave. but without choice,
exhumation has to be done. exhumation, to dig up the remains and proceed to cremate the remains.
i woke up at 6.30am and my family reached cck at 7.45am and so did my relatives. as we stood around the grave as the guy started digging, i recalled memories of the routine we did. i remember during primary school, how i was so fussy that i always drew a black face when i got there. i remember not being able to take the unbearable heat, and
bugs just won't leave any of us alone, they still don't (ants kept crawling.. my mother's worst enemy and likewise for them). my nose used to be ultra-sensitive and incense just drives me nuts and irritated (i caught a chill this morning and as i came close to the incense, my nose just drop dead). as i grew older, i learnt to be more respectful towards such practices and just go along with it (at least better than my brother, he kept making remarks throughout the entire process. i guess it is true to a certain extent of what yiyi told me last time that, people always laugh the unfamiliar off.) haha. every year, the little kids will put coloured papers on top of the grassy place, whatever that is. i progressed (: haha. my cousin and brother now do it, oh well, did it. you know, there's this
plant with red leaves that started growing on its own near my ah ma's grave quite awhile back. and we could never remove it no matter how hard we try. the adults never fail to wait every year to see what new
gadget my ah gong would buy to cut it off, but somehow it would
always grow back! there's always the same few brooms and "cutter". one year, my ah gong bought a mini (but sharp) "cutter"! every year,
the stick will be there. this stick was of the right length to check if all the incense paper completely burn. and it would always be somewhere around the grave. if i remember correctly, someone said on one of the years that it has become our stick. which is quite true.
yeah, through this, my parents learnt that the death anniversary of my ah ma, 3 oct 1962 when my dad was 7years old. that's long. haha. my dad is like OLD. 3 oct, is the same as my parent's wedding anniversary?!? haha. anyway, since it's been 44years, there weren't any remains left. only a couple of coffin nails and some rocks with bone residue (i assume. otherwise what's the point of the rocks). yeah, then went to mandai for cremation!
i had the smell of grass after i came home.
⥠lost for words and i drift.